Anxiety

I spend a lot of time these days looking at ceilings
counting breaths
changing thoughts
staying home
focusing on reality

The problem is I'm looking up because I'm flat on my back
and my reality is
counting breaths
changing thoughts
staying home

I can't focus because I'm too busy
counting breaths
changing thoughts
staying home

I want to spend my time punching holes through ceilings
so at least if I'm forced to be flat on my back
I could see the stars
and then maybe I could breathe
maybe the heavens would consume my thoughts
maybe I'd choose to stay home
and stars would be my reality