slack

I'm tired of pointing fingers and playing the games
shifting blame
me vs. them
them vs. us
me vs. you
me vs. us
them
us
me
you
I'm tired of cutting them slack
I want to cut the life support line already
because my Life needs more Support
my life needs less slack
I've given them slack
I've given them time

WE

We need to cut Us some slack
I need to cut you some slack
You need to cut me some slack
we need time
we need the life support
we need less of the blame
and I'd like to point a few more fingers away from us and back toward them

I want to hold up the mirror to the slackers
what if we did this to you
why don't you pick up the slack
Slackers

I've already dropped the string
I've reached the end of my line
pull on someone else's
strings are so heavy
with the world on it

2nd impression

Naked I came from my mother's womb

but I've been covering up for some time now.

Bundling up in lies that I could disguise myself in

layers so thick you wouldn't recognize me anymore

I was hoping you would stop looking for me

Like a year-long game of hide and go seek

I hid in the darkest place I could find

yet you kept looking

I even turned my back in all my camouflage and quit the game

I had convinced myself you couldn't see through it all

that you had given up

but you knew me the whole time

you played the game

and you walked with me when I walked away

I bet you even chuckled at my poor excuse for a costume

I thought the cover up was flawless

so

here i am.

but I don't wanna play games anymore

I'm DONE hiding

and all these layers are getting heavy

so I'm turning around

peeling them off

one painful mask at a time

until all there is

is who I am

facing

who you are

nothing to hide

showing you all that I got

naked I came and naked I will depart

you knew that all along

so here is me

this is what I got

It ain't pretty

but I want You to see it All

because breathing under costumes is impossible

all I wanna do is inhale you again

but first I gotta find my lungs

and with my first breath I'll say

Hi.

Nice to meet you again.

My name is Lydia.

i got nothing to hide from you anymore

everything I am is all yours

if you still want me

i am yours.

between flying and falling

I need a little normal

I need something in the middle

I need just enough

...but not too much

I have the tendency to go overboard

'go hard or go home'

right?

wrong.

because when I go hard I fall harder

and going home means giving up

so for now I gotta find something in the middle

something to take the edge off

before I fall off of it

and this time

it's on me.

enough

Haven’t you had enough

Because I’ve had enough

So for now this is enough

And forever this has to be enough

Because He is enough

There is nothing more than enough

And nothing better than enough

And enough is enough

For me.

dark.evil.ugly.

8.30

Lying on the floor of Satan's playground

where darkness only exposes more darkness

the light comes only to suffocate you and remind you

of the game you've been playing

while soldiers of the Lord are fighting for souls

And you thought they didn't need to fight for yours;

because you were saved

But all you did was get off the floor for a little while

all you did was dust yourself off so you can pretend you were never there

lies.

the darkness knows how much you love to play

the dark knows its all you can think about

it's day time now, but soon the darkness comes to consume

to light the fire of sin and ignite you with the excitement to play

use the day time for sleeping

remain in darkness behind the protection of your own eyelids

never letting the light of day seep in

you are living a lie in the day anyway

but stop pretending as if you don't like it

stop pretending like you don't know

you're rotting on the floor of Satan's playground

through the window

It's pouring in Pupukea

and even though Postal Service hums in the background about sleeping in

I wish I had woken up earlier to see this

Because even when it rains, it's beautiful

It's then that I realize that even if you'd cry

you'd still be beautiful

I'd sit in your cool breeze and stare

at how lovely you are

I wish I had talked to you sooner to see you cry

But I'm still asleep

please

don't wake me

I don't like the rain

I hate it when you cry

and I'm not ready to see your beauty

mosh

"what have you been up to since college?"
I looked around at all the faces
of all the people that made up the last 2 years of my life
and wanted to say,
"ask them"
Because they are what I've been up to since college
Each face unique in size, shape, age, and color
no two alike
equal in beauty alone
full of stories of the past 2 years
Stories of trials, tribulations, love, heartbreak, redemption, and holiness
Ask them because they were there
and stuck around to tell the story
I looked around and realize I don't have to say anything
Because my stories speak for themselves
My stories are in this room
laughing
loving
breathing
moving
and speaking for themselves
My stories are ALIVE
You can look into the eyes of my stories
aren't they beautiful?